Phil, 25. Brooklyn
Shooter and Video Editor for NowThisNews
"This guy is so sexy that
every time he posts a picture
of himself, he gets over 10 notes.
Yeah, that sexy.
And he will post a few
text-based gems here and there.
And his 5 item lists are entertaining."
-Reliable source that isn't me
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Birth: You encounter ‘normcore’ somewhere on social media. You are shocked that there is a part of internet zeitgeist you haven’t heard yet. You panic because you don’t know how long you’ve been missing out.
Normalization: You steer every conversation towards the opportunity to use ‘normcore’. ”Chipotle? That’s the ‘normcore’ of burritos!”
Someone you hate starts using it: You know that kid who got into Thursday when “War All the Time” came out? (Yeah fuck that kid.) You’re at a bar with him and the many mutual friends necessary to justify his presence. He uses it in a way that appears less sophisticated to you. “Sperrys? Sooo ‘normcore’.”
The Purge: 70 Twitter unfollows, 3 tumblr filters, and 4 broken friendships later, the word ‘normcore’ has been expelled from your life. You are finally free to exercise what little wit you’ve retained. “You’re going to Kohls? Nah, I have enough decorative towels, thanks.”
Your Mom Says it: and like most of the things your mom says, you take it in stride because she’s your mom and god damnit, she’s trying.
7 Years Later: You’re at a party, which is a shitty party because you’re presumably out of your prime now. Some kid you always kinda hated, but never had a reason to cut off, says “Hey! Remember normcore?” The macbook DJ plays a record scratching mp3 clip. The entire party glares in silent fury.
Singularity and the Rebirth of all things: Maybe this time we should avoid words like ‘normcore’ altogether.
Thank you.1 week ago